If you squeeze an apple, what do you get? Apple juice. Right? Why is that? Because that is what’s inside. You wouldn’t expect orange juice, would you? Orange juice only comes from oranges. When it comes to our anger, the same applies. When life squeezes you, what will always come out is the anger trapped inside.
Anger expresses itself in a multitude of forms, from a mild resentment to a highly destructive rage. Revenge, indignation, fury, vindictiveness, hatred, contempt, criticism, sarcasm, defensiveness, impatience, frustration, stonewalling, aggression, violence, rebellion, explosive behavior, abusiveness, abrasiveness, argumentativeness, smoldering, pouting, and even jealousy are all different degradations of anger.
As a human emotion, anger has a lot of energy and its main function is to fully energize you into action. For example, when you’re tired of being tired of being taken advantage by others and you get really angry at yourself for allowing others to abuse you, that’s when you finally decide to do something about it. That’s when you raise your fist and say, “Enough, is enough! This will never happen again!”
Used positively and constructively, anger can be used to fire up your goals, create a new job, improve a relationship, or seek a better romantic partner. But when left unexpressed or unacknowledged, it will build up inside of you as juicy time-bomb waiting for the right person, stressful situation or event to squeeze it hard enough out of you so that it can be released. Can you relate?
The main reason the majority of us can’t control our anger is that we buy into a commonly held belief that all anger is unpleasant, undesired, destructive, undignified and unspiritual. As a result, we throw away the baby with the bathwater and end up suppressing, repressing or altogether escaping our anger through the use of alcohol, drugs, or other distraction mechanisms.
What you disown, owns you. All the unacknowledged, repressed and unexpressed anger you’ve not been dealing with in a more positive, healthier, and a wholehearted way will keep recurring each time life squeezes you hard until you finally choose to start handling your anger. This means relinquishing or surrendering your anger so that you can move into a place of greater emotional ease, comfort, and freedom. This is what the path to Emotional Self-Mastery is all about.
Given what I’ve just shared, I’d like to leave you with some empowering questions you can take into your heart:
What are you feeling most angry about in your life at the moment?
If you could learn to re-direct the energy of that anger towards a specific goal or ideal, what would you love to create instead?
How will achieving this new goal, dream or idea impact all areas of your life?
Feel free to leave me your comments below.
From my heart to yours.
Photo by Sharon Garcia